Impotence

I have an exercise I’d like us to try. Take a journey with me:

In the bible, G-d gets pissed at humans and decides to kill everyone but Noach and the animals. How all of the plants survive is a moot point but Noach and the animals get a heads up and build a boat…well, Noach builds a boat. Hopefully, his kids helped.

G-d floods the world. The waters recede and here’s where it gets interesting. The line in the Torah goes something like this:

"When the bow is in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between G-d and all living creatures and flesh that is on earth (Gen: 9.16)."

Let’s play with some synonyms, shall we?

Switch “bow/rainbow” for “post-it note” and you get:

When the post-it note is in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between G-d and all living creatures and flesh that is on earth.

Let’s also switch out “Covenant” with “promise not to KILL YOU ALL AGAIN (9.15)”

When the post-it note is in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting promise not to KILL YOU ALL AGAIN ….

I’ve highlighted “reminder” because G-d needs a frickin’ reminder? G-d is worried that G-d will just FORGET to not destroy us? I find this entire exchange VERY disquieting. I’d also like to take a line to note that the previous verse clarifies that we’re just talking about not killing humans…by flood.

“I will remember my covenant between Me and you and every living creature among all flesh, so that the waters shall never again become a flood to destroy all flesh. (9.15)”

So, G-d’s up front about this covenant euphemism…and it’s only by flood. See Sodom and Gemorrah if you question my notation of this nuance.

If I may quote an 18^th century preacher:

"The God that holds you over the Pit of Hell, much as one holds a Spider, or some loathsome Insect, over the fire, abhors you. (Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God, Jonathan Edwards)”

Now, I’ve excepted an angry G-d as my gift for being Jewish. But this garners to my mind the confusion that anyone, EVER, thought G-d was either omnipotent or omniscient. G-d loses Adam, Abraham, Moses, just off the top of my head. Oh yeah, and NEEDS A POST-IT TO NOT KILL US.

G-d might be a chump. That is all.